It has been a long time since that “break up” with Gek Theng. Since then, she has had been through a relationship with that Wushu guy, with another rumored relationship with my good friend Yanto. Yet, something in me just couldn’t forget about her. Was it guilt? Remorse? Regret? I don’t know. Whatever it is, it was too little too late. I did have another crush since, which not many people knew about, but that too got to nowhere. Many of my mates still notice I had something for Gek Theng. True, but I duly denied.
Then came a chance. Somebody told me that Gek Theng was single once again. I hesitated, not sure if it was appropriate to try for it again. I started to converse with her again. The SYF season was around the corner, and we both were involved in our respective performances. I began to give her little surprises like chocolates before school, and started to text her. (She has got a phone since) But things seemed different from before. The feeling I used to have wasn’t as strong as before. It didn’t help that that Wushu guy was also involved in the SYF performance as well. I was jealous, as all other guys would; my heart was like tearing apart. Why could he still be so close to her even after breaking up? The feeling of Déjà vu became stronger, when Kok Leong showed me the Wushu guy’s blog one day. He wanted reconciliation. This time I was devastated. Not again I thought. When I saw the chemistry between them during rehearsal one day, I broke down. Maybe that also explained the horrendous performance in my debate that night!
I gave up any thoughts of me being with her again. I stopped messaging her, and spoke only during class, as normal friends would. Needless to say, I was dejected, downcast and all so despondent.
Then, at this darkest of times, I received a message from Khai Loon. I didn’t know her well at that time, except that she was a good mate of Gek Theng. She told me to cheer up and that Gek Theng wasn’t everything. Honestly speaking, I was quite shocked to have received that message. I seldom talked to Khai Loon, except during examinations, as she was seated next to me.
I wasn’t into another relationship (not that I had one before), but I just wasn’t in the mood to. Nevertheless, Khai Loon continued messaging me, and I found out that she had also just broken up with her boyfriend. Then, without knowing it, we started chatting online for hours, sharing jokes, joys and even our troubles. From the slightest of odds, we actually sort of clicked. Without much realization, I found that I had begun to like her. I was forgetting about Baby (Gek Theng), Khai Loon was beginning to take over her place in my heart. I decided to get to know her better. I made attempts to stay back after class to study with her, even to the extent of going shopping at a chocolate factory outlet. I nearly bump into my aunt that day! It was during this period that I found out that she was two years older than I was. I mean, who’d thought of that? She was one of the smallest built in class, and she is eighteen? But that didn’t matter. Age wasn’t a factor when one’s struck by cupid. That Wushu guy was also younger than Gek Theng when he courted her wasn’t he? Also during this time, I found out that Khai Loon lost her dad when she was young, and that she didn’t like the uncle that was supposedly courting her mum. That may well explain her own failed relationships with guys in the past. I wanted to be the difference. I could shower her with love, care and concern. I dropped hints on having a relationship, but found that she didn’t want a BGR at that moment in time.
Thus, I decided that maybe a formal relationship could wait until after “O’s”, but was that to be the case?