Teenage Years

Finally, I’ve become thirteen! I’m officially a teenager. However, that title comes with extra responsibility. Secondary school life awaits me and that is something I am not looking forward to. I like being simple. I do not like the extra workload, the extra attention and the extra pressure. Yet, this phase of life is inevitable in Singapore. Secondary schooling is just a passing phase to your future. Now, at the end of my secondary school life, looking back, I really wished I could turn the clock back. Wished I had changed the outcomes of certain matters during the past four years. Thinking back, it does bring tears to my eyes…

Anyway, I do not have fond memories of secondary school life. During the first few days, even weeks of secondary school life, I missed my primary school friends. Jason had left for America. My best friend and buddy had left for Clementi Town. Most of my mates from primary school had either left for other schools or had lost contact with one another. Of those who followed me to Fuhua, were Yi Zhe, Jun Wen, Si Thu, Wei Sheng, Amanda, Jia Min, Shu Bin, Brenda and Bee Suan. Furthermore, only Jia Min and Amanda were streamed into the same class as me. I was once again in danger of losing not only my friends, but my confidence as well. This would heavily place my secondary school life in peril. The first few days of school were terrible. I remember waking up every morning not wanting to attend school. I was a quiet person. My new class was not really in proportion in terms of gender. Three girls to one boy. In the class of forty one, there were only eleven boys. I only exchanged a few snippets of conversation with a Malay boy, Yanto, and a Chinese fellow, Edwin. Both who later became some of my best friends ever. To make things worse, I was sick for the first two weeks of orientation. I spent more time in the toilet puking, rather than interacting with my classmates, which wasn’t really a good thing when you’re meeting them for the first time.

Secondary two was slightly better. I’ve made more friends. Chien Wei, Kok Leong, even people like Sham and Hiroki from class 2D, were beginning to notice me. I did lose some friends en-route though. Notably, Zhao Mian. Zhao Mian was the genius of the class. He entered Fuhua with an all time high aggregate score of 254. We got along OK in secondary one. Not the best of friends, but not exactly enemies either. So it came as a shock when he came up to me one day during morning assembly and told me that he wanted to break off ties with me. I was flabbergasted. Asked him why, and he would ignore me. To date, he is still ignoring me. Yet, I don’t know why or what was the reason for the sudden backlash. Egoistic. He made me look like a fool when I met him once on a bus. I said hello to him, but got no response from him. It was so embarrassing. It’s like talking to a wall and people are all looking at me. Maybe they thought I stole his girl or something. But honestly, if he is continuing this hostile relationship, why should I give a damn? Gay piece of shit. Not kidding. Imagine him hanging around with girls all the time, not that he’s Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt, he is… gay. “I feel like a cocoon becoming a butterfly!” More like a guy becoming a girl. Disgusting.

Secondary two was also the year I met one of the best teachers in business – Mrs. Tay. She was a wise lady, gave the best advice, and used the best teaching methods. A no-nonsense teacher, she was truly a professional. The sad thing however, was that under her teaching, although most of her students excelled, a few of us didn’t. That included me. I didn’t understand why, but under Mrs. Tay, my math grades deteriorated. From an all time high of 96/100 in secondary one, to an all time low of 30/100 in secondary two. How was that possible? People around me were achieving better results except for that minority. This resulted in extra classes for us after normal school curriculum. This extra remedial, was hell. While all your friends are on the field playing soccer, you stuck with Mrs. Tay, doing algebra. The few of us who stayed back were eventually nicknamed “godchildren”. It wasn’t really a good accolade, in fact, it was embarrassing! At least you could see results reaped from the hard work Mrs. Tay and us, “godchildren” put in. All of us managed to pass the end of year examination and successfully promote to secondary three. Couldn’t imagine what would happen to me if I were retained!

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